ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize