okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
