I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
