at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
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