There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
