How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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