If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
