I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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