What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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