it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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