So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize