okay pat passed out under dana's car
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
