When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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