You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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