were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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