Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
