i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize