dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize