Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
