I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
