i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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