i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
3pm strippers are depressing
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
