He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
