Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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