worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
