Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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