Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
