trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Ketchup is God's man juice
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
