You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
