what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
