I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
