So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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