? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
