they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
So much rum. So many feels.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
