ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
