I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
