This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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