I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
