It's just like the Real World with babies
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize