Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize
