that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
