it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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