He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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