The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
