I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
