U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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