Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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