i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize