why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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