Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I think I just sharted jello shots
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize